Keeping friends while dating

Complaining about being “friendzoned” is incredibly harmful to our relationships and can cripple our capacity for both healthy friendships and healthy relationships.The friendship-first approach is not an isolated theory. Our existing friends have always been our best source of referrals.I mentioned my predicament to Jessica, and she excitedly revealed that her good friend had just moved to the city I was visiting.She quickly connected us via Facebook, where her friend and I immediately hit it off and subsequently spent the whole weekend together.Despite the romantic promise of most dating sites, the likelihood of discovering that your internet date is truly compatible with you across all major dimensions of compatibility is quite low.According to PEW research, as of last year, only 11% of US adults have used online dating sites, and of those, only 23% have actually entered into a relationship with someone they met there.Jessica later introduced me to yet another awesome friend in San Francisco, and once again, her friend and I ended up having amazing chemistry.

Both online and offline, friends provide instant validation and accountability.This friendship-first approach has fundamentally changed my understanding of dating and relationships.Observe what happened next…A year after meeting Jessica, I needed to travel to a new city for work and I realized that I had no place to stay there.New dating apps like Tinder, Hinge, and Coffee Meets Bagel make us log in with Facebook, and they display the mutual friends we share with users on the app, which generates feelings of credibility and trust.The worlds of dating and social networking are on a path toward convergence, and friendship is the driving force.

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