Truth: I met my ex in the stone age of Yahoo personals.
Back then there were quite a few black lesbians on the site.
MPH is quick to point out that “What begins as empowering self definition can quickly become a prison…
This means that they are validated, admired and praised based on how they behave, not on who they are.” So how then can this translate to something as simple as opening oneself up on a dating site?
When put in dating terms, what that really says is “I don’t want my face appearing on a dating site because then people will think I can’t get a date and trust me, I am too fly for that to be the case.” While I can’t speak for the whole of black lesbians everywhere and while acknowledging that we’re not a monolithic group anyway, I definitely feel connected to what my friend was saying.
Even while writing this article, I have a hard time saying it, admitting that I need help in the love department. Online dating ups the amount of vulnerability involved because it’s there for the world to see.
Many Black lesbians have taken matters into their own hands by setting up groups on sites like Meetup, but I’ve found that those are usually one group just recycling their dating options amongst each other and who wants to be a part of all that internal drama?To me it connects to this quote from psychologist Regina Romero: Society expects the African American to handle losses, traumas, failed relationships and the dual oppressions of racism and sexism.Falling short of this expectation is viewed by many African American women as a personal failure. Romero have presented, it would seem that black women would avoid spaces like OKC for a few reasons.Weitere Informationen zu unseren Cookies und dazu, wie du die Kontrolle darüber behältst, findest du hier: Cookie-Richtlinie.As a Black Mo C butch lesbian looking for love online, I can tell you that they’re not on Ok Cupid or Dattch or any other online dating site.