"If you're always waiting around, he won't feel the need to try that hard."Build some intrigue into your schedule that keeps him wanting more.Wait a few minutes to text back, or if he asks if you're free Tuesday, say that you have other plans but you'd love to meet up on Wednesday."You have to decide which you want more: a guy who's committed or this guy, even if he won't ever be," Trespicio says.Spending Saturday morning in the soup kitchen or helping an elderly person carry his groceries may be all it takes to have him calling you girlfriend."You want to be the fast-moving car that he wants to jump into, not the one sitting in the parking lot, waiting around," Trespicio says.Keep up your long runs on the weekends even if he wants to hang out, and don't expect (or nag) him to skip his weekly basketball games in favor of seeing you.
When you're out to dinner, make sure not to constantly check your phone or dart your eyes around the room.
If it's been about six months and he hasn't dropped one hint about where he sees this going, casually speak up, says Jennifer Kelman, a licensed social worker and relationship expert at
For example, if you'd like him to meet your parents, ask if he'd be up for going out to dinner with them, but let him know there's no harm if he's not quite ready for that yet.
This helps him to realize that your time is valuable and that he'll have to go out of his way to see you. "Don't move dates around too much—that can get frustrating for a guy who also has a busy schedule like you," Trespicio says.
It's easy to let parts of yourself go when you meet someone you think is the man of your dreams. "Trying to be someone you're not is so transparent to a guy," Kelman says.