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And whether they end with tears and empty Ben & Jerry's or last until forever maydepend upon countless factors, but your own actions, words, and thoughts undoubtedly play a role.One thing that'll give you an advantage in the game of love?For example: 'I get annoyed when I see dishes in the living room.Would you please put them back in the kitchen when you’re finished? Ed., LPC-S, a certified Gottman therapist and master trainer for The Gottman Institute"The number one thing I have learned about love is that it is a trade and a social exchange, not just a feeling.Relationships simply evolve into what they were always meant to be.It’s best not to try to make something that is meant to be seasonal or temporary into a lifelong relationship.Loving relationships are a process by which we get our needs met and meet the needs of our partners too.When that exchange is mutually satisfying, then good feelings continue to flow.

When you decide to learn to love yourself rather than continue to abandon yourself, you will discover how to create a loving relationship with your partner."— Margaret Paul, Ph.Partners should be especially sure that their values match before getting into marriage.Although other differences can be accommodated and tolerated, a difference in values is particularly problematic if the goal is long-lasting love.When people feel recognized as special and appreciated, they're happier in that relationship and more motivated to make the relationship better and stronger. Make small gestures that show you're paying attention: Hug, kiss, hold hands, buy a small gift, send a card, fix a favorite dessert, put gas in the car, or tell your partner, 'You're sexy,' 'You're the best dad,' or simply say 'Thank you for being so wonderful.'"— Terri Orbuch, Ph.D., professor at Oakland University and author of "There’s no such thing as a failed romance.

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