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As Christian Rudder, an Ok Cupid co-founder, tells it, women who were rated very attractive were unlikely to respond to men rated less attractive.But when they were matched on Crazy Blind Date, they had a good time. Rudder puts it, “people appear to be heavily preselecting online for something that, once they sit down in person, doesn’t seem important to them.”Some of what we learned about effective photos on Ok Cupid was predictable: Women who flirt for the camera or show cleavage are quite successful.” “Have you ever traveled around another country alone?” and “Wouldn’t it be fun to chuck it all and go live on a sailboat?

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But what works well for predicting good first dates doesn’t tell us much about the long-term success of a couple.Many singles compare it to a second job, more duty than flirtation; the word “exhausting” came up constantly. Is there a way to do it more effectively, with less stress?The evidence from our two years of study, which included interviews around the world, from Tokyo to Wichita, Kan., says yes.Afterward, users were asked to rate their satisfaction with the experience.The responses were compared with data from the same users’ activity on Ok Cupid.

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